Listen / Read
When Jesus died for us, it was a bit like he’d had his face mauled off by dogs and thereafter surgically replaced with the face of someone else. You know, a bit like that.
I’m not saying it’s exactly the same. But he did have lots of thorns digging into his forehead, and though they may not have torn Jesus’ entire face off, they would certainly have left some nasty scratches. So, you know, it’s a bit like Jesus had his face torn off and surgically replaced with the face of someone else. A bit.
It is a bit like that.
Because when Jesus came back from the dead and said hello to his friends and that, they didn’t recognise him at all. It’s like he had a different face. Like his own face was torn right off, and another one was stitched back on in its place.
He looked that different, after he had died and come back to life again, that people thought he was a recent face transplantee. ‘Holy fuck, Jesus’ said they. ‘You were only wearing a crown of thorns, but you look like you’ve had your entire face torn off, and had an entirely different person’s face stitched back on. What the fuck? Is that what happens in heaven? Fuck that shit. Judas had the right idea.’